Finally, a good pure for pking by fl0f   12 months ago

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After being fired from the local bakery for eating all the bread, a former baker and ex-mercenary of the wilderness pursues a career in construction for the Varrock landscaping agency. A job with physical exercise and plenty to occupy his mind away from his bread obsession was just what he thought he needed. That was, until the boss of the construction gig brought a fresh baguette to work that fateful Tuesday. The former baker’s neck riddled with sweat and skin itching intensely like a deprived cocaine addict, he challenges his boss to a battle over the bread. Little did he know, that his boss, Roger, has mastered 8 different kinds of blue-collar martial arts. A 4-day clash including hand-to-hand combat, wizardry, archery, and connect four, ensues in the Varrock courtyard, until a mistake is made. Roger slips up momentarily, distracted by the fact that his shoe had become untied in the contest. The window was open, and the ex-baker took the spare sledge hammer they used for knocking down walls and knocked Roger’s brains across the battlefield. Seizing his reward of the now stale baguette, the ex-baker takes his prize and the sledge hammer, and travels to Bounty Hunter where he intends to reignite his career as a mercenary by murdering senseless bystanders in the wilderness and using their bones to construct a Christmas tree for the holiday season

For those curious as to what GP went into making this:
35-81 mage: ~12m in chaos/air runes (splashed in f2p)
1-80 range: ~16.8m in cannonballs (roughly 80k)
1-64 construction: ~5m (including butler fees)
Tele to BH target scroll: 2.2m
Edgeville respawn: 5m

Total: ~41m

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